What did the penis say to the condom?

Pierre, a brave(?) French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie out for a pleasant little picnic by the River Seine. It’s a beautiful day and love is in the air.

Marie leans over to Pierre and says, “Pierre, kiss me!” Pierre grabs a bottle of Merlot and splashes it on Marie’s lips.

“What are you doing, Pierre?” says the startled Marie. “I am Pierre, the brave fighter pilot! When I have red meat, I have red wine!” She smiles and they start kissing.

Things began to heat up a little and Marie says, “Pierre, kiss me lower.” Our hero tears her blouse open, grabs a bottle of Chardonnay and pours it on her breasts.

“Pierre! What are you doing now?” asks the bewildered Marie. “I am Pierre, the brave fighter pilot! When I have white meat, I have white wine!” She giggles and they resume their passionate interlude, and things really steam up.

Marie leans close to his ear and whispers, “Pierre, kiss me much lower!” Pierre rips off her underwear, grabs a bottle of Cognac and pours it on her lap. He then strikes a match and lights the cognac on fire. Marie shrieks and dives into the River Seine. Standing waist deep, Marie throws her arms into the air and screams furiously;

“PIERRE, WHAT THE F*** DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?”

Our hero stands and says defiantly, “I am Pierre, the brave fighter pilot! If I go down, I go down in flames!

A 90-year-old man said to his doctor, “I’ve never felt better. I have an 18-year-old bride who is pregnant with my child. What do you think about that?”

The doctor considered his question for a minute and then said, “I have an elderly friend who is a hunter and never misses a season.

One day when he was going out in a bit of a hurry, he accidentally picked up his umbrella instead of his gun. When he got to the Creek, he saw a beaver sitting beside the stream. He raised his umbrella and went, ‘bang, bang’ and the beaver fell dead. What do you think of that?”

The 90-year-old said, “I’d say somebody else shot that beaver.”
The doctor replied, “My point exactly.”

A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face. The egg is frowning and looking very frustrated.

The egg mutters, to no one in particular, “Well, I guess we answered THAT question!”