Three dead bodies turn up at the mortuary, all with very big smiles on their faces. The coroner calls the police to tell them what has happened.

“First body: Frenchman, 60, died of heart failure while making love to his mistress. Hence the enormous smile, Inspector”, says the Coroner.

“Second body: “Scotsman, 25, won a thousand dollars on the lottery, spent it all on whisky. Died of alcohol poisoning, hence the smile.”

The Inspector asked, “What of the third body?”

“Ah,” says the coroner, “this is the most unusual one. Billy-Bob the redneck from Oklahoma, 30, struck by lightning.”

“Why is he smiling then?” inquires the Inspector.”

“Thought he was having his picture taken.”

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Picture Humour, Redneck | Email to a friend | 95 views

How many rednecks, does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Three. One to hold the bulb, and two to turn the ladder.

Redneck | Email to a friend | 213 views

A redneck teacher decides to give her class a small pop quiz around Halloween.

Okay, how many of you have seen a ghost? About 30% of the class puts their hand up.

Okay, how many of you have actually touched a ghost? About 10% of the class puts their hand up.

Okay, how many of you have had sex with a ghost? Dead silence, until a little redneck boy in the back row puts up his hand.

You’ve actually had sex with a ghost?

Ghost? Oh. I thought you said goat!

Redneck | Email to a friend | 283 views

Two rednecks meet on a dusty country road. One of them is carrying a big bag labeled, “chickens.”

Chickens, eh? says one guy. “Hey, if I guess how many chickens you got, will you give me one?”

Heck, says the guy with the bag, “iffin you guess right, I’ll give you both of ‘em.”

The other scratches his head and guesses, “Um… five?”

Redneck | Email to a friend | 216 views