Me fail English? That’s unpossible.
Hi, Super Nintendo Chalmers!
Mrs. Krabappel and Principal Skinner were in the closet making babies and I saw one of the babies and then the baby looked at me.
Eww, Daddy, this tastes like Gramma!
I bent my wookie.
The doctor said I wouldn’t have so many nose bleeds if I kept my finger outta there
Ralph: “Daddy, I’m scared. Too scared to even wet my pants.”
Chief Wiggum: “Just relax and it’ll come, son.”
I heard your dad went into a restaurant and ate everything in the restaurant and they had to close the restaurant
And, when the doctor said I didn’t have worms any more, that was the happiest day of my life
I found a moonrock in my nose!
That’s where I saw the Leprchaun. He tells me to burn things!
If cartoons were meant for adults, they’d put them on in prime time.
Marge: I’m sure you’ll make plenty of friends. All you have to do is be yourself.
Lisa: Be myself? I’ve been myself for eight years and it hasn’t worked.
On Nelson: He’s not like anybody I’ve ever met. He’s like a riddle wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a vest.
I am the Lizard Queen!
Solitude never hurt anyone. Emily Dickinson lived alone, and she wrote some of the most beautiful poetry the world has ever known… then went crazy as a loon.
Relax? I can’t relax! Nor can I yield, relent, or… Only two synonyms? Oh my God, I’m losing my perspicacity! Aaaaa!
[Lisa in goal for hockey team]
Lisa: Milhouse, knock him down if he’s in your way! Jimbo, Jimbo, go for the face! Ralph Wiggum lost his shin guard! Hack the bone! Hack the bone!
The strong must protect the Sweet.
Oh no! What have I done? I smashed open my little boy’s piggy bank, and for what? A few measly cents, not even enough to buy one beer. Wait a minute, lemme count and make sure… not even close.
Homer no function beer well without.
When will I learn? The answer to life’s problems aren’t at the bottom of a bottle, they’re on TV!
Son, when you participate in sporting events, it’s not whether you win or lose: it’s how drunk you get.
I’m going to the back seat of my car, with the woman I love, and I won’t be back for ten minutes!
[Meeting Aliens] Please don’t eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them!